[messengers] Fully Wicked Sick Fixie Messenger Bag

Date: 15 Sep 2010 13:15:16 +0200
From: Michael Dodd <mikeydodds@xxxxxxxxx>


This is a sweet awesome piece of vintage messenger history up for sale. This
Crumpler Fux-Deluxe has been used by me, a fully wicked sick MESSENGER as I
delivered parcels in cities as exciting as London, Sydney, San-Fran and
Adelaide getting sweaty and sticking it to the man by delivering his

It can hold a carton of  beer, if you’ve drank two of them , you could take
the rest to a party and all the chicks there would be like “that guys is so
awesome, look at his awesome vintage MESSENGER bag, I think I’ll put out to
the max” If you’re a chick this also works with dudes, unless you like
chicks, then it works with them.

This bag is 100% working condition and has been used in numerous covert
ally-cat races, some of which I even finished. I remember once this dumb
suit asked me what the weather was like outside while I was wearing this bag
and I was all like “why should I talk to you suit, you corporate slave” and
then I pulled a wicked vintage track stand on his face.

The bag has been used for many years and is very worn and faded and contains
many examples of hard coreness especially around the non-functional zip.
However, this wear will boost your retro-vintage MESSENGER credibility to
stratospheric levels and allow you access to all the secret messenger hang
outs and parties that I can’t tell you about because you don’t own this bag
yet! This bag will also make your whip 1000 times more killa, and will allow
to do bar spins and monos provided that you can do them already.

Included with the bag are an awesome scrote and a phone holder. Scrotes are
for holding radios which is how your fat controller tells you to stick it to
the man but you’ll need it to hold a second phone cos everyones gonna want
to call you when you’ve got this sweet bag. Also are two genuine fully
awesome MESSENGER uniforms, as worn by a real MESSENGER. You’ll be so
popular you’ll be leading the ladies (or dudes) around buy their nose rings
and tongue studs.

It makes me very sad to let this fully sick bag go but I’ve had an image of
it tattooed onto my calf and can safely let go now. The extreme cultural
value of this bag is above $10,000 so don’t be stingy.